We live in a society which has successfully made us believe that failure is the worst thing that could happen to us. As a child, I was taught to create the greatest distance from failure because its only aim was to ruin my life. In everything I did, I worked hard to avoid failing because I did not want my future to be ruined. Little did I know that failure had been described to me in a vague manner which only focused on its negative image. As I progressed in life, I learned that failure could either be the stepping stone or the hindrance to my advancement in life.
Relationships was an aspect of my life that I experienced failure in. The ability to maintain interpersonal relationships was one that I lacked, but it took failure in my relationships for me to discover this flaw in me. When I first began college, I realized that my cultural and social backgrounds had created a barrier which made me view people in a certain manner. I met different people and unconsciously made conclusions about them either because of their physical features or the actions they displayed. I did not intentionally do this, but this had a negative effect on my relationships with people. I soon noticed that the failure which I had been taught to avoid was standing right there in my face. This brought up some confusing thoughts within me and I realized that failure of any kind was inevitable. With this understanding, I sort to find what impact failure would have on my life. The need to change my perception of people arose and I knew that I had to take a step to make this necessary change a reality.
It was a big struggle to change the way I thought about people and to become more flexible to accepting different kinds of people all the time. I tried hard to pretend like prejudices towards the types of people I wanted to associate did not exist, but every time it seemed like I was trying to accomplish the impossible. Sometimes, I continued to abide in my darkroom where I accepted people into my life based on my image of the right people. As the time went on, I began to speak with different people, to read books, and to think about how beautiful it was to realize that people around me though different, had great insights about life. I was excited to have a new view of the world and continued spending time with different people. Gradually, I began to freely welcome people of different ideologies and beliefs. With these different experiences with people, I discovered how much I had lost by restricting myself from other people mainly because I felt they were different or were not the right people.
I had failed in accepting people for who they were and if not for the period of my failed relationships with people, I will still be in my dark room where restriction was in abundance. Today, I am still creating more relationships with people and connecting with different kinds of people. There is no failure like success because it took my relationships with people to fail before I could identify the gaps and amendments I had to make in order to have successful relationships. Contrary to the idea I had grown up with about failure being negative, failure is the stepping stone I need to make a change and move ahead in life. On the other hand, we are being manipulated by people’s opinions and society’s standards on the issue of failure.
There is a misconception that failure, which I previously described as a good thing, should be acceptable in our society. This idea has made many people give numerous reasons for why they failed. This should not be confused in any way. The only time failure can be a success is when people carry out actions that produce positive results after their supposed failure. What matters is the step that is taken when people fail not the actual period of failure. I have met different people who believe it is okay to fail, but it is not okay when one does not move from the spot of failing. Just like I mentioned about my failed relationships with people, my success in this aspect will not be possible if I did not step out of my comfort zone to correct the wrong I discovered existed in my relationships. Failing at something is not a success, but the action performed after failure is what makes the difference. This can be related to the difference between successful and unsuccessful people. Successful people take note of their failures and turn them into successes, while unsuccessful people do not.
Failure and success are two words that people attach various meanings to and these definitions determine people’s approach to life. Personally, I believe without failure, success cannot exist because the essence of a positive thing has to be highlighted by the presence of a negative thing. That is, success will not be appreciated if failure does not exist.